OverRated: Younger women dating Older Men

In most younger women:older men relationships, it is the man who is in charge. Because he is older, he is generally earning more money and has more experience. Not quite a sugar daddy but, especially when the young woman is still in her late teens/early twenties, he tends to be the more dominant influence in the partnership and most women will accept that… because it is in their nature to defer in that way… and, as they mature, the relationship should become established on a more even footing.

However, it is not always that way and some women will remain in a secondary position for the entirety of their marriage.

Whilst others will have the responsibility thrust upon them even when they don’t want it.

You should be stronger than me
You been here seven years longer than me
Don’t you know you supposed to be the man?
Not pale in comparison to who you think I am
You always wanna talk it through
I don’t care
I always have to comfort you
When I’m there
But that’s what I need you to do
Stroke my hair

I’ve forgotten all of young love’s joy
Feel like a lady, but you my lady boy
Amy Winehouse ‘Stronger Than Me’

It was weird reading the lyrics because it summed it all up, right down to the seven year age difference and the fact that I needed him to be the ‘man’ in the relationship sometimes.

Don’t get me wrong, I didn’t want someone who told me what to do, treated me like a second-class citizen… I just wanted a man that I knew I could rely on to be strong when I needed bolstering.

But, instead I was always the one who had to take control and give us direction.

Perhaps that’s why he was the way he was with the children… did he do it deliberately to destabilise me because he resented the roles into which we had settled?

I tried to get him to be responsible, but he always handed it back to me.

So, I just got on with it.

And, by doing so, did I unman him to the point where he no longer had any balls?

OverRated/UnderRated Sunday