The New Lelo Mia Vibrator Review - Entering the Orgasm Realm

It was not until I got into the car that I realised the full potential of the latest version of the Lelo vibrator, the Lelo Mia.

I remember when some other blogging friends reviewed the original pink model that it was a usb vibrator – as in, you can recharge it via the usb socket on your computer. This means that, when you’re away on business, you don’t have to worry about plugs and cables. Have laptop, can travel.

However, back to the car. When I purchased the replacement automobile for my beloved Range Rover, I was instructed by my children to ensure that there was MP3 player connectivity. I had no idea how to achieve this but it transpired that it would be via a cable from the device to a usb socket in the console between the two front seats.

When I got in on my way to visit Ruf, I noticed the slot that only gets any action when one of the kids is a passenger and suddenly the lightbulb went off in my head off as to the additional recharging possibilities – even if I didn’t have my laptop.

And so to the device itself. The new Lelo Mia 2.0 edition comes in black and has an improved motor compared to her predecessor.

There are some women who love collecting turquoise Tiffany cartons. Me? It’s the sensual black packaging of a Lelo box that gets my juices going.

Inside, the Lelo Mia Vibrator nestled – capless – in her slot, the USB clearly on display. Just like a dongle, she plugs directly into the side of the laptop – I had been concerned that she might be slightly too bulky for the machine to remain flat on the table but Lelo have designed this very carefully so it works perfectly. However, there is a small extension cable in case you have another device plugged in to the port next door and space is tight.

After an hour, the LED stopped flashing and Mia was ready to go – for the next 1.5 hours.

Made of phthalate-free silky-smooth ABS/silicone, she’s like a cross between a fountain pen, a lipstick and a fat cigar – sleek, shiny and black with a silver belt around her middle. The cap covering the USB is shaped like a rather large brand new lipstick with an oblique slant which makes a girl think of a whole host of possibilities.

So I depressed the ‘+’ button to get her started and then held it down. She almost took off in my hand, there was so much power there. But there was almost no noise. Just a whisper of sound behind a whole lot of oomph.

The default is for continuous vibration and you just keep pressing the ‘+’ button (or hold it down if you want to go straight to the top) to reach the maximum intensity. This I experienced through my jim jams on one of those glorious almost-spring mornings when the watery sun is blazing through the window but producing no warmth whatsoever.

With the lipsticked slant firmly pressed against that most delicate spot between my legs, it was very enjoyable but something was missing. So I thought I’d try the other end and lay it fully along the moistening gash.

At which point, hey presto, my world exploded. Without Ruf, my solo masturbation is normally a fairly silent affair. A few intakes of breath here and there but I’m supremely conscious of my neighbours, so keep a tight rein on my vocal appreciations.

With Mia, I lost any form of control. Legs akimbo, I wore her vibrations throughout the length of my body and, in the distance, I could hear some banshee going for it big time.

Mia most definitely won round one as I finally admitted defeat by pressing the ‘-’ button whilst she ground abruptly to a halt.

I could still feel the tingling residue of her efforts in both my hands and my toes several minutes later as I tried to regain my composure.

Mia looked across the bed at me expectantly, almost daring me to take my best shot, and I picked up the gauntlet and got stuck back into the three different pulses.

You hold down the ‘+’ button until it reaches maximum continuous vibration, then release and then depress again for two seconds. This takes you to the buzz space buzz space buzz space mode. Press the ‘+’ again to get jab jab jab like a finger poking at you and then hold down ‘+’ for again to get tap tap tap mode. And, finally, push the ‘-’ to take it back to maximum continuous vibe.

It was not until my fingers became quite uncomfortable that I realised the error in my technique. The oblique, flat lipstick shape was not an additional stimulation texture but a handle to facilitate ease of use. The vibrations do not reach that part – hence my lack of sensation when I pressed that part to my nether regions at the start.

With my digits relieved of the tingles, I lay back to soak up the pleasure. Legs open, eyes closed, I just relaxed into the sensations, languidly swapping from pulse to vibration and back again.

By the time the Lelo Mia Vibrator had finished with me, I could no longer see the sun, my vision was so patchy. I had entered that elusive realm where your brain is no longer connected to any body part other than your clitoris.

As the literature explained: “The clitoris is the only feature of the human anatomy whose sole function is to convey messages of sensual pleasure. Use it wisely, often and with care”

The things I do for you readers!

Oh, and just to check all its functionality, I also inserted it. There is just enough length to entertain those muscles at the entrance and just inside. It was certainly very pleasant.

So, finally, I held down both ‘+’ and ‘-’ buttons simultaneously for five seconds to lock the interface and prevent any possible accidental activation. Then I popped her into her white satin bag and tucked her away at the bottom of my capacious handbag, ready for action the next time I feel the mood – wherever that might be.

As a businesswoman, I’ve discovered that there is at least one advantage to travelling with a laptop.

PS The new Lelo Mia 2.0 will be available from 21st February.