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I Wanna Scream, I Wanna Shout

I wanna Scream, I Wanna Shout!!!! But I have to bite my lip and remain enigmatically Mona Lisa-ish.

If I don’t people will say I am being selfish and behaving badly.

I can just see the characters in EastEnders or Coronation Street putting up with this without a cross word.

I think it’s the feeling of betrayal that hurts the most. To find out that all my family members are meeting up with my ex regularly – often when I’m not there.

His family do not arrange to meet me and I would not expect them to.

So, is it because I feel some sense of blame here, the taking of sides because they appear not to be taking sides.

Surely, in most families, you would see more of your relative, not the ex who made her miserable for years?

It just makes me think it’s all my fault – which seems extremely unfair when they have no idea of what actually happened.

But to start creating a scene and washing dirty linen in public does not seem terribly well mannered or even desirable.

It would just be nice to think that they thought enough of me to be able to trust that I made the decision for a reason.

Not that I ran off with some bloke and left my husband to bring up the children.

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2 comments to I Wanna Scream, I Wanna Shout

  • maybe do a bit of visiting yourself, then. Not to air laundry, but to make clear that it is NOT appreciated to join with the ex under any circumstances. It is uncalled for.

    Then again, meeting “accidentally” some of his relatives may just be what it takes to wake his bum up.

  • Joanna Cake, HavingMyCake

    It’s so difficult because I don’t want to be badly behaved. And, at the end of the day, it’s not so much his behaviour that I object to but the feeling of betrayal by my own family who have not rallied around to support me in what I feel should be the expected fashion.

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