Remember the fastest way over a man is to get under another one….stay distracted, stay busy. Start a diet or major exercise program. Start a new blog. Resolve to drink your 8 glasses of water a day. Go to bed early for a week in a row. Stand up straight. Smile even if it’s faked. Fake it till you make it.”
It was Southern Girl who posted this as a comment on someone else’s blog and it made me stop and think. I would post a link to her site but it doesn’t seem to be working any more.
I guess that piece of advice stands for almost any situation where you feel that you have been wronged. You have to control the controllables.
Worrying about what might have been if only… it does no good. You cannot change anything, you just tear yourself up even more inside with no hope of rectifying the issue.
You have to brazen it out externally but internally you need to just let it be whilst you allow yourself to heal.
Speaking to one of my children who is holding on to some very intense anger about issues which happened in the past and manifested in self-harm, I recall my own young adulthood and my battle with anorexia.
This illness was my mind’s way of trying to deal with what I felt were huge iniquities in my life. But by allowing my mind to control my food intake, I was just perpetuating the problem. Feeding the inner turmoil even though I was not consuming any physical sustenance.
My body was starving around a central core that remained burning bright as I fuelled it with mental insecurity.
It took thirty years to quash that flame into a glowing ember.
And the fire brigade came in the form of six counselling sessions and the love of a good man who is prepared to talk to me about everything and anything.
Bringing these internal issues out into the open and facing up to them is key in recovering from anorexia and self harm. The person concerned may not want to discuss it, may try to fake that all is well in the hope that they will get over it.
But, without professional help, it is unlikely that they will beat such demons.
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