“He is someone that I can talk to. He is warm, he is present. He’s not off trying to run the free world.”
“You realise that this is your pattern? Every time somebody disappoints you, you are off looking for the next shiny thing.”
“Im trying to convince myself that he is wrong, that he is just some stupid fantasy but every time I see him, my heart races and I feel pretty, I feel connected.”
“I have been there and I have to tell you that that feeling is the end of your marriage.”
“So do I have to go home and pretend…?”
Kitty McAllister and Sarah Walker, Brothers and Sisters
People deal with disappointment in love and relationships in different ways.
Some suck it up and grin and bear it, feeling that the positives still outweigh the negatives.
Others call it a day and depart swiftly to avoid watching the relationship deteriorate further.
Still more think that they can put up with it only to realise that they are developing feelings for someone else who comes into their orbit whilst they are so vulnerable.
It isn’t deliberate. It just happens. It is there. The knowledge of those forbidden feelings.
A meeting of minds, the feeling that you are special to someone. All contributing factors.
And sometimes it’s just too hard not to give in.
Checking the top sheet of my clipboard, I place it carefully on the floor in front of my seat and duck under your outstretched arm to slide across the central console. Making sure your hands are replaced firmly on the steering wheel in the correct position at ’10 to 2′, I straddle your lap and start unbuttoning your shirt.You have a rainbow of different coloured garments but you’re wearing the black today. It’s the one I like best. My favourite shirt on my most gifted pupil.
So, one button at a time, trailing my finger down to the next and kissing your chest as it reveals itself to me. Running my tongue over the tattoo that runs down the top of your arm from your shoulder, licking the space between your nipples – slight detour to the nipple bar for a suck – soft kisses over your solar plexus and down, lapping at the smooth little rolls of skin and the ripples of muscle underneath, feeling something pressing up against me through your jeans.… An Antidote to Dealing With Disappointment
Damn. You floor me! This post is very timely for myself.
*sigh*
Shit. Shit. Shit. That television show dialog has managed to hit me very close to home.
Love your “antidote”, but it a may it just make things worse for me. That would never happen with my current relationship. I see that potential somewhere else though, and it’s driving me mad.
“Im trying to convince myself that he is wrong, that he is just some stupid fantasy but every time I see him, my heart races and I feel pretty, I feel connected.”
Strike out “he”, “him” and “pretty”, and that’s me talking. :-(
Yes you’re right. Sometimes things just happen.
I think, if we’re honest, a lot of us have been there. Some would say it is brave and honest to act upon those feelings, others that it is deceitful. The question is how will you feel about it afterwards? If you do something and it’s awful, you will regret for the rest of your life. If you take the plunge and it is the most wonderful thing since sliced bread, how will that impinge upon your normal life? And, in the excitement of the moment, we often forget that once we felt this way about our current significant other…
“Still more think that they can put up with it only to realise that they are developing feelings for someone else who comes into their orbit whilst they are so vulnerable.”
Ok….that’s me. Completely, totally what happened to me. I was on auto pilot when someone found me and pointed me back in the direction of my sexuality. The road is not easy and yet for now I stay and hope for brighter tomorrows.
Awesome show btw (tape it regularly) and great post!!
xx
I love Brothers & Sisters! It is made by the same people who were responsible for 30something nearly two decades ago and has the same wit and attention to detail, coupled with some amazing writing.
Yes. The choices are maddening. Passion can be such an elusive, and sometimes seemingly destructive, thing.
Thanks to my own set of circumstances, I’m stuck in a “wait and see” mode. There are several paths before me. But after 4 decades plus of walking the Earth, I know that where we think we might be headed is rarely our true destination. Sometimes things seem to happen with reason and clarity. Other times it just feels like random bullshit. Chaos and Order at war, it seems.
*sigh*
I just have to keep my chin up and sometimes just muddle through it.
Time alone will tell. I can’t make any rash decisions – the aftermath would be too great.
You are a very insightful woman, Joanna Cake. This, and several of your comments on my own blog, have at times left me speechless and awed by your perceptiveness.
I wish! My insightfulness is only with the benefit of hindsight… Been there, done that. Now, if you could just tell me the best way to handle the next phase of a relationship :)