In response to the Troll’s CULINARY THROWDOWN CHALLENGE, I submit another offering from Ruf, my Vegan culinary expert:
Basil-Laced Tofu Pasta
Basil-laced tofu (available from most good health food stores)
Bag of spinach
Fry some onion and garlic in a pan
Add the mushrooms.
Dice the tofu into cubes and place in the mixture
Chop up some vine tomatoes and throw them into the pan
Stir in a big dollop of tomato puree
Pour in a little water, followed by a whole bag of washed spinach
Boil some rigatoni pasta tubes in a separate saucepan until al dente and then mix into the other ingredients.
Leave to stand in the pan whilst you give your female at least seven orgasms and then reheat two platefuls in the microwave. This allows the tomato and basil flavour to really permeate the pasta, as well as earning you lots of Brownie points for satisfying two of her most basic needs.